Why goats are the future of gaming

I’m a Microwave with legs, a force of true chaos. I have catapulted myself across the map and into a town full of evil sheep warriors who are running around on fire. (They weren’t on fire before I got there, but in my defense, they attacked first.) Looking at my inventory, I have an apple, a chair, and the person who gave me my first quest. As I try to jump into the second floor of a house, a sheep headbutts me and I fall through the entire map. For a few seconds, I’m a ragdoll trapped in a…

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